Memoirs of a dying man
by Anguirus111
Summary: There is nothing more dangerous than the truth. (Begins as prequel to Trigun)


Anguirus111 Note: My first and probably only Trigun fic.  This story is probably not going to fit into regular continuity, but hey you can't win 'em all right?  Still though, this series of events explains to me how certain things happened that just seem unlikely in the anime.  Some of the statements this character don't reflect my personal statements, but that character's.  I'm not trying to belittle anything in this story.  This story gets very dark at times but then again so is Trigun so what do you expect from a fic based on it.  This story doesn't center around Vash and Knives exactly so don't expect this to be entirely about them even though a fair portion is.  This chapter is going to be a long one.

Excerpts from the Electronic Verbal Journal of Alexander Kemmering, junior scientist assigned to "Project Seed" for the United States Government.

May 17th, 2155: Today marks my first job after getting out of college, something for the US government called 'Project Seeds'.  I didn't realize that microbiology was that important a subject to get a government job immediately out of college but hey what do I know?  I should just be grateful that I managed to make it through college before being drafted into the US military.  With my degree I'll be less likely to be drafted for the US war machine.  I wish the talks weren't breaking down in the UN over what to do about oil shortages since the last bit of oil was pumped out of the Middle East and OPEC went bottoms up.  The United States has gone just a little bit over the top with its obsessions and seems intent to invade Australia, consequences be damned.  But that isn't supposed to concern me now, only the project at hand.  Well journal, wish me luck because today I find out what exactly I'm supposed to be doing.

May 18th, 2155: Where to begin?  This project doesn't really deal with 'seeds' at all, well it does just not in the way I imagined it.  Course what did I expect from the government, a job that fits the description?  Hah!  Not in this lifetime.  Oh well, most of the project is classified and I've had to move my stuff into the base here at the Dry Lake Bed in Nevada.  Supposedly this is what was once popularly referred to as 'Area 51' but I have no idea what that means or why it was so popular.  The base commander joked that aliens were discovered in another state, New Mexico and the bodies were brought here.  It's utter nonsense but alas I'm digressing.  I need to stay focused for my assignment and I might as well start here.  Our project is called 'Seeds' to throw off any spies to think we're dealing with plants.  Instead we're dealing with the creation of super soldiers for the United States.  Soldiers who don't need to be produced in mass quantities, soldiers who can avoid anything thrown at them, can survive intense nuclear radiation, and who can infiltrate any society and have no one believe that they are indeed the super soldiers.  I don't know how we're going to accomplish this but the project's just starting I'm sure someone will think of something.  Talks are still breaking down and apparently these super soldiers are to be ready when, not if anymore it seems, the United States invades Australia. I'm not happy about this, but my loyalty is to my country and not myself.  What have I gotten myself into?  Here's hoping for the best.

June 17th, 2155: A few weeks have passed and so far we don't seem to have gotten much further than the basic outline.  Everyone seems to agree that modifying the human DNA structure is the way to go since the mapping of the human genome was completed years ago.  Diplomatic relations have become so strained that I heard rumors that large groups of people are getting together and are combining their funds to buy a spaceship and leave Earth.  I should probably be doing that, but I know that it's not possible to leave this project.  Granted they heads don't tell us this, but those scientists who have expressed discontent with the project have simply 'disappeared'.  Apparently the US wants to put this under such close wrap that they won't allow anyone to leave with any knowledge on the project.  The government is putting increased pressure on us to produce something, but all of our experiments have failed thus far.  Exploding bodies, mutated apparitions, strange goo, the list goes on and on.  Project head Revnunt Buskus figures we need to go in some radical direction, but I'm frankly at a loss for ideas as to what direction to take.  This project is getting stranger and stranger.

July 4th, 2155: The fourth is today and what a happy day it is.  I think everyone realizes the end of the world is coming soon and it seems every country has decided to open up old wounds and grudges they've harbored for years.  Revnunt Buskus decided to invite his niece Rem Saverem to join our team.  I don't know if he cleared it with the government, but we've simply run out of ideas.  Rem, that's an interesting name, sounds like she could put people to sleep.  Ha, ha.  Boy it's been awhile since I've laughed.  It feels good in the event of what's going on.  Hopefully she'll come up with a course of action to take.  She'll arrive in a week at any rate.  We're going to celebrate later today our Independence Day.  Many of us hold serious doubts we'll ever see another one again.  Well, better enjoy it while we still can.

July 8th, 2155: Already people have begun evacuating Earth on spaceships.  Everyone knows war is coming and those who can leave are fleeing.  We can see the lights in the sky as the ships fly off into the unknown.  They don't know where they're going, but any place is better than this.  I wish them luck and Godspeed.

July 16th, 2155: Well I am impressed.  Ms. Saverem has really managed to push this team in new directions.  She came up with a brand new idea that using genetically engineered humans as soldiers was a bad idea because humans are just to weak to survive most extreme conditions.  But plants are not.  Plants are more adaptive to various conditions and could survive a nuclear fallout and keep on surviving.  They also generally can have longer life spans then humans so by creating genetically engineered plants that resemble humans, we can create a perfect soldier capable of adapting to any situation.  The best part is that it means we wouldn't be loosing any human lives during the war.  As much as I hate war, it does spurn incredible scientific advancements.  Martial law was declared today as riots have begun breaking everywhere as people either try and board ships leaving the planet or our stealing whatever they can to make their lives as prosperous as possible before Armageddon strikes.  I was hoping that humanity would bind together as they realized the end was near, but even that was too much to hope for apparently.  I hope those who venture forth learn from the mistakes here today and that something like this doesn't happen again.

July 25th, 2155: Our darkest nightmares have finally been realized.  We were just informed that at 0240 hours this morning, Europe has gone to war on itself.  By the time I write this, Spain, Holland, and Switzerland are already gone to nuclear blasts.  Germany apparently is once again the cause of yet another World War.  The president has officially declared that World War III has begun.  Once again the United States is declaring neutrality but with communications failing over the world we don't know if any nation knows this or if they do know would obey our neutrality.  Still no word if we'll go to war with Australia, but from the looks of things we will, and soon, because the whole world is up for grabs apparently and it's winner take all.  This would have been funny if not for the grave situation at hand.  We have had some success in adapting plants to the rigors of our mission parameters.  Rem seems to have an incredible knowledge about plants and genetic manipulation and it's helped us immensely.  Now the biggest task is at hand as we attempt to make these plants appear human.  I suggested using nanobots to make the plants be bio-mechanical in nature for even better offensive and defensive capabilities and that idea seems to have gone over well.  I finally feel like I'm contributing to this project.  I just wish we weren't at war.

August 15th, 2155: The director's words still echo in my ears as I write this with a tremble in my hand and tears in my eyes.  The United States declared war on Australia and begun launched nukes at Australia.  We uncovered an old spaceship that was used during the height of space travel fifty years ago.  It's old but it still flies.  The scientists and military personnel are prepping it as I write this and we're evacuating the planet.  The super soldier seems moot now although we are taking the research with us in the hopes it can be applied elsewhere.  Arghhh!  It makes me so mad as to what is happening here!  Don't those idiots in charge know they're dooming the entire planet by nuking each other!  They're so stupid!  Maybe humans do deserve to die on this planet and not spread their evil anywhere else I don't know for I have any idea as to what our future holds and it is shit.  ***Update*** At 2100 Hours we lost all communications with the outside world.  Now we don't know what's happening out there, but it isn't hard to image what is.

August 16th, 2155: Thank god most of us were inside the base today because a nuke went off directly above Las Vegas and blasted it to a crisp.  There was a brilliant flash of light and then silence before a large explosion went off followed by a rumbling.  The flash of light blinded some of the scientists who were outside and the EMP wave following the blast knocked out some of our equipment but for the most part we're still okay.  Some of us are thinking about suiting up in radiation suits and checking for any survivors, but most agree that we won't find anyone.  Nevertheless some of us are going.  I swear if we don't leave this planet soon we'll become permanent residents as our ashes are spread to the winds.  I think I can see nukes exploding off in the distance and no doubt killing millions.  Why God, why does this have to happen to us?  Haven't we suffered enough already?  It's not fair!  I go to religious services as many times as I'm required to, but seeing these nukes falling and humanity being vaporized from the atomic fire, I'm beginning to have my doubts that God cares about us.  Some scientists are beginning to have doubts that God even exists because if He did, why would he let this happen to us?  I simply don't know what to think or believe anymore, this war has changed everything we've ever believed in.  What is the truth?  I don't know anymore, I've got nothing left to believe in anymore.  The project is still being conducted by Rem and she's achieved even more astonishing breakthroughs in genetic manipulation of the plants.  Somehow she got them to speak English by modifying their stems and buds with nanoprobes.  I don't understand much of the technology itself, but it does seem promising.  With no one to really watch us anymore, some scientists believe this project is sacrilegious, but I simply don't care.  This existence sucks.

August 19th, 2155: I've just come back from the trip to Las Vegas.  It, it's too much for words to say what we found there.  The great city is nothing more then a crater in the ground.  Sure some wreckage of building remains, but the charred remains of human flesh is just too much to think about.  I never thought I'd see what I saw today, but I was wrong, the remains of Las Vegas is what we were taught as children as to what hell looked like.  We viewed some survivors of the blast, but they were shells of their former selves, it was if they weren't humans, but had degenerated into cavemen.  Seeing the great city being nothing more than debris made me really want to hurl inside my radiation suit.  This is not supposed to be how life is supposed to turn out.  We're supposed to live in peace and harmony with our neighbors, not live in the shadow of Nuclear Winter.  I keep telling myself this is a dream and soon I'll wake up and I'll put this off as a bad dream, but this is too horrific to be a dream.  No one's imagination is this sick and twisted.  I can't believe less than half a year ago this was all a beautiful area.  This is bullshit, all of it.  I'm seriously considering ending it all now with my gun that comprises half of my possession with my journal being the other half.  One of these days I'm going to end my suffering.  Today was my birthday believe it or not.  I just turned twenty-two, I should be readying myself to enter the prime of my life with a brilliant future to look forward to.  Instead as I look at myself, I see a boy who has grown up to fast and has seen too much in this world to go on.  I only keep slight tabs on the project now but Rem says she's ready to modify the plants to appear humanlike.  I wished her the best of luck, but I can't think of anything besides the war that's going on here.  I'm still waiting for that final nuke that will hit this base and blast it to pieces.  Knowing my luck however, it'll never come.  Life is cruel mistress don't let anyone convince you otherwise.  Back to Rem though, the scientists have convinced her to put off the project until when/if we evacuate the planet.  She's a little bit upset, but she agrees that we do need to leave the planet otherwise all the research and experimentation will have been for nothing.  God help us all.

September 1st, 2155: Well today was the day.  We finally evacuated the only home we'd known for our entire lives.  Earth is now a big ball of gray because of all the nukes.  You can only see a little blue here and there.  This wasn't how I'd imagined seeing Earth once I made it into space, but at least I'm alive.  I'm really not sure what is more depressing, the fact that our only home that we've known for our entire lives as well as the only home every one of our ancestors has lived on, or the fact that humanity failed itself today as the final nukes exploded above Jerusalem and Montevideo Uruguay.  According to our scans, some humans must've survived the explosions, but their future looks extremely bleak and they don't have much hope to survive another fifty years, but humans are resilient, they'll survive somehow.  Looking to the future, we see an unknown universe ahead of us.  Some planets had been surveyed and charted, but none of them were habitable.  What we're trying to do now is find the others who already evacuated the planets on their own ships and form some sort of convoy and retain some semblance of life back on Earth.  With only the operation of the ship our only distraction, we can now focus more on our experiments.  We originally brought five genetically engineered plants with us when we took off, but one of the cases holding them broke and we lost three of them leaving us with only two left.  It's been decided at Rem's instance that these plants are not to be super soldiers, but instead humanity's last hope.  They will use their enhanced abilities to help enforce the law and uphold justice while also helping humans create a society that doesn't go the way of Earth.  Sounds evangelical in nature, but I'm not complaining, there's no more room left in the universe for talk, there can only be action.  In an effort to truly help these plants blend into society, we've given them names.  All scientists agree that if these plants are to stop humanity from warring with each other, then they need to have the name of a human who believed in peace and disarmament and non-violent protests.  Gandhi and Martin Luther King were circulated about before everything agreed that it should be the name of someone of recent history whom most people would recognize.  We named the plants Vash and Nick after the great peacemaker of our times, Nick Vash.  He was a great sympathizer of peace and was running in the last presidency before he was assassinated.  Many suspected the current president of having the attack orchestrated, but all investigations seemed to come up with nothing so with no one to run against our president, he won by being the only name on the ballot, some land of freedom this is.  Anyway, Rem is ready to push forward the genetic acceleration of the two plants and we can only wait and see if the experiment is a success or not.

September 9th, 2155: We found the particle trails of a fleet of ships heading in the same direction we're following it in the hopes of catching up with them.  The plants are slowly beginning to develop human characteristics as well as turning slightly metallic in nature.  Rem assures us everything will turn out fine.  I'm having my doubts but what do I know I'm just a 'junior scientist'?

September 11th, 2155: Today marked the 154th anniversary of the destruction of the World Trade Center by terrorists who hijacked a quartet of planes and used them as offensive weapons.  Oddly enough it was this event that in all likelihood lead to the destruction of Earth as it made the world paranoid about their neighbors and each became more hostile as a result.  Other than that the event doesn't hold much significance anymore.  We certainly didn't alter any of our plans to recognize the event.  Other than a required radio announcement of the anniversary, there wasn't any more talk about it.  Everyone's tired of death and destruction and the destruction of two buildings and the damaging of a third pales in comparison to the deaths of billions on a global scale as well as the annihilation of just about all of mankind.  Do I feel sorry about those who died those years ago?  Yes, but to dwell on the past only gets in the way of advancement of the future, especially with times as trying as they are.  According to Rem the plants should be humanlike in just a few weeks thanks to rapid genetic acceleration.  They're beginning to grow appendages and other features that are humanlike.  Rem wanted to make one male and the other female, but the body of scientists overruled her saying these plants cannot be allowed to reproduce at any cost.  I'm beginning to sense hostilities among the scientists about this experiment.  I hear them some of them talking about how making plants appear to be human is the gravest of sins anyone could commit and if someone found out, it could mean the negation of God.  I don't take it that far, but I do admit the whole idea about plants posing as humans is kind of creepy when you think about it.  Whatever, there's nothing I can do about it now and I'm just going to ignore it.

September 17th, 2155: We located the convoy of ships.  The radio communications have been sparse between the ships as everyone seems to either be brooding or in shock about what happened to Earth.  Where we're going seems to be a mystery, but apparently we're all moving towards a rumored 'lost Earth Colony' on some planet a few light years from Earth.  It'll be a long journey, but there should be humans there and hopefully some semblance of civilization will exist there.  Ah who am I kidding?  We're screwed regardless.  Earth was our only home and there's no way we'll ever be able to replace it.  There's a reason why things are the way they are and humans belonged on Earth.  Without it, what's to stop people from going back to the days of gun slinging and the day of the Old West?  Not much in my opinion.  We're still pressing on despite the odds.  Better to live on a planet than a ship I suppose.  Nick and Vash should be done soon.  It's kind of funny, from that description they sound like bread in an oven, but that's pretty much the truth.  You know, I hope they never find out what happened to humanity and Earth, because if they knew the truth, I think they'd be repulsed by it and not want to save it.  I might warn the head scientists about this.  Anyway, those two will have a hell of a responsibility awaiting them, I hope they can face it and overcome it otherwise humanity is doomed.  Course the same would be true if they ganged up on humanity, but that's just a risk we'll have to take.  Rem has said that she should be the one to watch over both of them so they'll grow up right.  The council said she could raise one of them but the other would grow up under their rules and regulations.  Rem was upset but she knew if she didn't comply, then both the 'plants' could be wrested from her control and she'd have no say in their development.  She chose the plant named Vash to raise and care for while Nick would be under the head scientists' tutelage.  I still hear gossip that the plants should be destroyed before their physical appearance becomes that of a human.  I somewhat sympathize with them, but I know that these 'plants' are humanity's best hope at survival even if they aren't human.  It's just a tricky subject.  Funny, I just realized that today was the four-month anniversary of the project.  I think every anniversary of this project will be one more year that I lost my innocence.  I wonder what would've happened had I not joined.  I probably would be dead by now I know that, but I don't know if that would've been better or worse than being on this cramped ship with the experiments we've got going on here.  I'm not a psychiatrist; I'll let them figure this one out for themselves.

September 30th, 2155: I'm beginning to wonder why I keep writing down the date for my entries.  Why should I keep date for a planet that I'll never visit again, a planet that is no more but a polluted wasteland in space?  I don't know anymore.  I'm not ever positive this date is correct, but it's good enough for me.  There's still been very little communications from the fleet and I'm not entirely sure as to where we are, but since Earth is no longer visible I'd assume quite far.  Course that's not saying much, but then again what do I know?  I'm an astrologer not a junior scientist for God's sake.  Okay, maybe I've had a little bit too much to drink.  Now I'm sure whoever reads this will think I've become an alcoholic because of Earth's downfall.  Well that's only partly true.  I'm also drunk because we had a party successfully commemorating the success of  "Project Seed".  Vash and Nick look just like human children, not like the plants they started out as and I'm happy for the whole team, really I am.  It's just that…I don't know, maybe it's just me, but these two children in my opinion are they ultimate downfall of human civilization.  Maybe it's the booze talking, but when humans have to create plants to save themselves, that definitely represents a dark time in human history.  Not as to say I've got anything against Vash and Nick in person, it's not their fault that they were the end results in this experiment, I just have second thoughts about the experiment itself.  It seems that we, Rem especially, were so wrapped up in seeing if the project would work that we forgot the moral implications involved and those who did were disposed of.  I don't know, I'm also worried about how the remaining humans would react to two plants that look physically identical to humans.  They'd claim it to be blasphemy and have them executed or crucified.  That's just how humans are; they destroy that which they don't understand and torture that which they only barely understand.  We'll just have to see how this turns out.  There's more destructive talk around the rumor mill about Vash and Nick, but so far that's all it is, talk.  Whether or not that talk turns to action has yet to be seen, but nine times out of ten there will be action and I don't know if getting Vash and Nick mad at us is such a good thing.  That's another thing that frightens me, if these two are just as capable as Rem claims them to be, then we might be in for real trouble.  They supposedly can dodge almost anything thrown at them and have destructive capabilities that are off the charts.  Simply put they're unstoppable and that could prove deadly if they decided to turn on humanity.  In fact I heard that Director Buskus is already crafting weapons for them that could bring destruction on a massive scale so that wherever we end up, we'll be able to defend ourselves with the two super soldiers.  This seems in direct contrast with what Rem wants and I can see a conflict arising in the future.  That in conjunction with the more angry debates about what to do with Vash and Nick seems to indicate that tensions are on the rise and soon may reach the boiling point and explode.  Here's hoping that doesn't happen.

December 25th, 2155: Today was Christmas.  It wasn't a very joyous one, as the only children onboard were Nick and Vash, and they were too young to understand anything anyway.  Rem wanted to at least celebrate Christmas with them, but the Director and the top scientists overruled her.  Apparently religion has no place in the survivors of the Apocalypse.  Nevertheless Rem is teaching Vash about religion in the hopes that it would encourage him to do what is right.  I don't see why she bothers, religion can be twisted to cause war it's happened plenty of times already so it could very well do so again.  I guess as scientists it's easier to dismiss religion than it is for the regular population.  I hate myself for thinking of religion as evil, but when your world and existence has been taken from you, it's easy to think blasphemous thoughts.  What has happened to me?

January 1st, 2156: Today was New Years.  Or to be precise it would've been New Years, not it's just another day from a planet that is long gone.  This New Years is being welcomed as the first New Year without any place to call home.   I guess it's time to face the truth, I have to face facts Earth is gone…forever.  There has been talk about how Vash's and Nick's growth abilities will be incredibly slower than a humans' because they're plants.  Rem and Director Buskus seem to be in agreement that some sort of growth acceleration is necessary in order to make them old enough to be taught.  They might as well go ahead with it because if they don't it'll be at least another human generation before they can get old enough to develop the mental capabilities to be taught and that generation won't have the same motivation that we have.  I look forward to seeing Vash and Nick for the first time tomorrow, I look forward to seeing how 'human' they appear to be.

January 2nd, 2156: My, my, my, we did build 'em well.  Vash and Nick look identical to human children in just about every way.  The only differences are that they have metallic portions on their bodies as a result of the nanobots.  According to Director Buskus, their metallic arm can be used to equate the same destruction as a nuclear warhead.  That alone seems horrifying enough, but they can summon up that energy from their metallic arms own power source.  Each of them is equipped with the smallest thermonuclear reactor on record.  As of this wasn't enough, Nick and Vash have had their memory records chemically altered so that Nick can only kill people but not physical objects such as buildings while Vash is the complete opposite and can destroy physical objects but not people.  The Director has gone crazy!  Nick Vash stood for disarmament not destruction.  Apparently even a man such as him can have his image corrupted by those who twist the images to form their own vision that they want to see.  Tis' a sad day and age that we live in.  Course it's nothing compared to the hell those people had to endure in the 21st Century, but I won't go into that now, the 21st Century's history is well known.  As for Vash and Nick, as much as I admire them, I can see why some scientists feel threatened by their existence.  If humans can create creatures like these, what's to stop us from creating demons and angels and then we'd have become in essence, God.  We've gone to far this time and I don't think we can pull ourselves back or repent from making this critical error.  Beware those who play with fire for inevitable they will be burned alive.  To the future!  May she burn in Hell for now and forever.

January 30th, 2156: Growth acceleration has begun on Vash and Nick.  In six months they should be the rough equivalent of ten.  In the meantime, the fleet is still searching for a planet.  The captain of the lead ship, an ancient space battlecruiser used when humans used to travel the stars in great numbers, claims to know where they're going.  I believed at first that they know where we're going, but after three months of aimlessly traveling past dead world that could never support life, I'm beginning to believe we're traveling in circles and the crew of that lead ship have no idea where we're going and are leading us in the attempt that if we find a habitable planet we'll generously give them supplies.  They're going to be in for a rude awakening because first no one will give them any supplies (it's not in human nature to share, but instead to horde) and we're probably never going to find a world even remotely habitable for human, much less plant, life.  We're going to die out here without a planet to call our own.  I should've done what my parents wanted me to do and join the armed forces.  That way I would've died along with my brothers, sisters, my whole family, and my fellow humans in nuclear war.  At least that way I'd have died on my feet.  This existence has me living on my knees and I will die on those same knees.  I'm a coward by not choosing the easy way out and joining the military and I sure as Hell am paying for it now.

February 23rd, 2156: Not much to say, I've just been doing my assigned job as a deckhand and I'm swabbing the decks.  At least I get to see sights that humans haven't seen for over seventy-five years.  I wonder if we'll see Knives McMahon a.k.a. Knives the Merciless?  Hah, that'd be funny because no one's seen him for over fifty years.  I suppose if some alien race stumbles across this diary they won't have any idea what the Hell I'm talking about.  Well, since I'm bored and have time to burn I might as well let them in on the secret.  About a hundred years ago humans discovered perhaps their most important discovery of that century, the Gravity Drive.  The Gravity Drive could propel ships faster than previously thought and it somehow made it possible to go faster than light.  The technology was top secret, but dozens of these drives were installed in hundreds of ships as humans wanted to go everywhere possible and soon.  That lead to the creation of what was coined 'The Plants'.  The Plants were another innovation and they provided everything a ship needed, from water to power to protection.  Anyway, humans traveled just about everywhere they could in the hopes of finding something alien or mysterious that couldn't be explained and brag about it back on Earth.  Well as luck would have it, they found nothing and everyone's hopes were dashed.  As dozens of ships returned home, rumor spread like wildfire that there was a planet with incredible riches just beyond Alpha Proxima.  Dozens of ships headed there in the hopes of claiming the treasure for themselves.  What actually happened was that it was a ruse by Knives McMahon who had decided to become a pirate of Space like the pirates of legend past that roamed the Seven Seas.  Knives knew people's greed would get the better of them so when the arrived, he picked them off by capturing their ships and looting them of everything he could.  Perhaps oddly enough was that after looting the ships he'd go on some self-righteous rant about how human's greed is the root of human evil and it should be wiped from the universe forever.  As such the ships he looted simply vanished.  Their remains were never found and neither were their crews.  His gang of pirates banded together and called themselves the Gung-Ho Guns.  Suffice to say after their looting continued, all of humanity gathered together for perhaps the only time in history and formed a battlefleet to take him and his gang out.  What happened after that is up to ones imagination.  The fleet supposedly engaged Knives and his enemy fleet above blackhole.  The battle raged on for well over an hour and Knives' engines were damaged to the point that they gave out and he was sucked into a blackhole.  But of course this can't be confirmed because there were no witnesses because the fleet that engaged him vanished as well.  So is Knives' dead?  Well simply put we don't know, but rumors persist even to this day that Knives is still alive and is somewhere prowling the Quadrant striking at any stragglers that happen to cross his path.  Funny, I never liked history, and I certainly didn't study much in regards to it, but here I am giving you a fully detailed report about something I would've only be able to guess at just prior to Earth's…destruction.  I guess it was destroyed, there's no more hope in holding out hope of returning to it.  Wait, didn't I just have this conversation a few pages back…let me see.  Yep I did.  I guess I've finally hit rock bottom with this entry…I'll just be going now.

March 18th, 2156 ET (Earth Time): We've developed a temporary new dating system for the sake of maintaining our sanity that has the date being what it was on Earth assuming we were still on it.  This system will be updated after the one year mark of Earth's destruction and will be coined AE(After Earth).  Things have improved for me since my last entry.  I've become the local resident psychologist.  My job is to preserve people's sanity and remind them that yes indeed, Earth did exist at one point and is not a myth.  I also give advice to those who feel that we truly aren't going to find another planet to inhabit and we're all going to die out here.  Helping these people has also managed to somehow help my own sanity as I attempt to knit us together into a closer unit, a family if you will.  We all need each other out here and we either all make it or we all die.  However, despite my attempts to bring the scientists together, no amount of talking is going to stop the growing divide I see between those who want Vash and Nick dead and those who want them to live and save humanity.  I still fear this growing divide will inevitably draw out an open arms conflict as the fate of these two experiments and indeed the fate of humanity hangs in the balance.  As if that isn't bad enough, some other ships are beginning to talk about leaving the fleet and striking out on their own if we don't find a habitable planet soon.  This might sound preachy, but if the fleet is broken up, then we might indeed be in deep shit because we need strength in unity.  If we're divided we could all be picked off one by one and then humanity would indeed die amongst the stars, forgotten by everyone else.  But alas I can't do anything about it because I'm just the ship's psychologist.  Even with my gain in power and notoriety, I'm still not powerful enough to enact change and it doesn't look like that's going to change anytime soon.  As for the project, Vash and Nick's growth acceleration is proceeding on schedule and as of this moment they should be just a little younger than three.  The head scientific council and Director Buskus have decided that Vash and Nick should not be allowed in any way to reproduce as we don't have the slightest idea how their plant DNA and human DNA would react in a mating situation.  If it were possible, the resulting offspring might very well kill the mother or if it didn't, the possible resulting genetic aberration would be too sickening for words to describe, the child-thing would instantly be shunned by all of society and I'm to afraid to think about what might happen next.  That was the Council's official reasoning, but I'm positive that if Vash and Nick had been given the opportunity to reproduce, it would've cause a riot among the scientists who want Nick and Vash dead and might've turned some of the scientists who were willing to tolerate their presence towards wanting to get rid of them.  That coupled with the fact that cloning them has proven impossible due to their level of genetic manipulation means they're the first and last of their kind, whatever that might be.  I guess I should propose to the council that we classify them because it's our job as scientists to do that.  I only wonder what we'll name them…  Anyway, more troubling news indicates that a ship full of beggars and vagrants who somehow managed to obtain a starship are planning to separate with the rest of the fleet.  Like I said earlier, I believe we should stay together, but it pains me to hear the other ships saying they should leave because there will be no more room for beggars and vagrants in our new society.  I had hoped such prejudices were all put behind us when Earth was destroyed., but I couldn't be more wrong.  It's sad, it truly is.  Apparently no matter how far we advance as a society, we're still held back by our old views of those society deems lower than us.  But just like that society of humanity's past, I'm still powerless to do anything about it.

May 17th, 2156 ET: Has it really been one year since I started work on this project?  It feels like ages ago.  I'm no longer that idealistic youth excited about escaping his fate of joining the U.S. military.  I wonder what frame of mind I was in back then, clearly I had no idea what the project was about and what was in store for me for the future.  I've got to stop dwelling on the past, it'll just bring me down.  The ship full of vagrants and beggars left the fleet a few days ago and their current whereabouts are unknown.  I hope they're safe and that they find a planet, one that's free from the prejudices of modern society.  Ah who am I kidding, they're going to die out there alone among the stars just like we are.  No!  No!  I must maintain control, we're not going to die out here and the fleet is going to find a planet that will support human lives.  I gotta go, I'm depressing myself.

May 30th, 2156 ET: We're still searching aimlessly for a planet to inhabit.  Turns out the idea that we were journeying to a lost Earth colony were indeed false.  The lack of response, verbal or physical, indicates just how low moral has sunk in this fleet.  Heck Director Buskus and Rem have come into my office for psychological counseling, and they're the ones who are as hard as a rock in terms of moral strength.  That can't be good, but I'm even more surprised these ships are still moving because everyone seems to have given up on tending to them.  The plants are working double duty to make sure this ship continues to run.  I wish I knew more about the plants, but even if Earth were to still be in pristine condition I probably still wouldn't have found out much about them.  Listen, when I realized that a few days ago that the anniversary of the project had rolled around, that got me thinking.  I went through all my notes and found out that I in fact did very little for this project.  Sure I suggested the nanobots and that Vash and Nick should be given a species name (the name chosen was Biollante, a creature from Norse Mythology that dealt with a plant that had a plant with a human spirit or so I believe), but other than that I've done very little.  I don't even know how Vash and Nick were created, just that they were genetically modified plants.  I've got to find out more so I can put my mind to rest.  Vash and Nick should be done soon so I look forward to seeing what they'll look like following the acceleration.

June 7th, 2145 ET: I still have found out nothing more about the project than what I already knew.  Every one of my requests to the computer asking for more information on the project has been shot done with the words: Password Encrypted.  As if this wasn't suspicious enough, I can seemingly no longer access files that I could easily access back on Earth.  I suspect a cover up but if I go to Director Buskus or Rem I fear grave consequences for my actions may result.  But I have to find out more about the project and why my requests for information thus far have been denied.  I'm going to try a less direct approach and ask around for information.  Hopefully this will pique people's interest in the project if they don't know the information I seek and soon the whole ship will want to know more and then Rem and Buskus will have to reveal it to us.  I must be careful though as I don't want to incite violence, but I need to know the truth once and for all.

June 30th, 2156 ET: I've decided to wait on spreading rumors for now until I see what I can dig up from my counseling sessions with Rem and Director Buskus.  With any luck they'll slip something when they're not paying attention and I'll pass it off as patient confidentiality.  The Director and Rem are beginning to let on that somehow using actual plants to be genetically modified was failing when Rem first came onboard and they had to use something else, something that could threaten the fragile peace onboard this ship and potentially doom humanity, but they had no choice or else the project would've failed.  As much as I hate to press on and know the truth, I have to.  I have to know what they did and why it's so important for all our sakes.  There is nothing more dangerous than the truth and have a feeling that when is all is said and done I'll end up regret knowing it when this is all over.

TBC-Soon: Vash and Nick emerge from genetic acceleration, the truth is learned about them, chaos ensues, and the ships finally find Gunsmoke and a frightening secret that exists there.


End file.
